I love you… Do you love me, too?

Most of the time, if not always, we expect to receive the reply to our “I love you’s”--not a ‘thank you’ but an ‘I love you too’.

This statement is not a question, yet we wait for its answer.

We actually wait for it to be said back to us or showed in whatever kind of ‘love language’ we prefer it to be expressed. We want to be affirmed that the person we said or expressed ‘I love you’ to loves us too. We want our love to be reciprocated. We desire to be wanted and accepted.

Have you ever experienced buying in a vending machine? You put in the amount needed for a certain item and then expectantly wait to receive it. When it didn’t release the item you purchased, you become very disappointed.

Sadly, we do the same when it comes to love. We love with the hope of receiving the same love that we gave. We love because we want to be loved back. And when we fail to receive back the love that we invested, we become frustrated.

We, then, start to question if the love we are giving is not enough, followed by a devastating question, “Am I not enough?” or “Am I that hard to love?” Here, you begin to question your worth too. You begin to see yourself unworthy.

Is that how it should really be? When we give love, we expect a return and if it’s not reciprocated, love already lost its value. We also lose our worth as a person when we don’t receive an ‘I love you too’.

Is it true? Can a love given or invested lose its worth? Is the person who gives love less valuable than the one who receives?

C. S. Lewis, a famous author proves this wrong when he said,

“Love is never wasted for its value does not rest upon reciprocity.”

Isn’t it that true love is unconditional? It gives not because of what it will get in return but because it just wants to give. Therefore, it’s so valuable.

It does NOT say,

“I love you because you love me too.”
“I love you because you do this for me.”
“I love you if you don’t hurt me.”

But it is the love that says,

“I care for you even if you don’t.”
“I will do this for you even if you won’t.”
“I will die for you even if you won’t for me.”
“I love you even if you do not love me too.”
“I love you because I want to.”

Is this love even possible? You might ask.

Does it even exist?

A big YES!

It is possible and it does exist because 2,000 years ago, a man proved it true.

A man named Jesus loved us and died for us even if we were still sinful and unworthy. And only when we understand this truth that we can truly love unconditionally. For we love because He first loved us.

Blessings through Raindrops

From being a person who’s not fond of rain, little by little, I began to be that someone who sees it as a blessing. 🌧

Before, I hate it when it rains because I don’t like my feet being wet. For me, it is so uncomfortable because it feels cold plus there will be dirt that might get stuck on my feet. It also makes me feel gloomy making me want not to do anything but just lie in bed.

Maybe some of you may also feel the same. But, you know what? Rain can also be beautiful.

Rain is beautiful.

Yes, rain may get you soaking wet. It may also be frustrating that it sometimes come when you least expect it (due to climate change). You may think that it can ruin your day especially when you’re so tired wanting to go home but you were not able to bring an umbrella.

But when you look at it from a different perspective, the rain that you’re trying to avoid can be something that some people might be waiting for for a long time. The rain that you see as a problem might be a great help to those who need it just like our farmers.

Imagine if it doesn’t rain for a very long time like what happened in the time of Elijah. There was a famine caused by drought because it didn’t rain for three long years. So Elijah prayed to God for a rain and God made it rain again.

That’s why, when it rains, may we always choose not to react negatively because ranting about it won’t do any good.

Instead, respond right.

How do we respond right to the rains we experience (literally and figuratively) in our lives?

1. Pause.

Don’t react right away. It will just cause more stress than you think there is.

When you pause, pray. For God said in His word, “Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” -Phillipians 4:6-7 MSG

Prayer makes us depend more to God than to ourselves and our circumstances.

2. Be grateful.

Instead of complaining, be thankful. Do you know that a grateful heart is a magnet for miracles? When you are grateful, you begin to see things (rains) differently and you learn to appreciate the beauty in it.

I remember the song Blessings by Laura Story. It goes like this:

🎶What if Your blessings come through raindrops? What if Your healing comes through tears? What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You’re near? What if trials in this life are Your mercies in disguise?🎶

There’s always something to be thankful for because no matter what, God is good all the time.

3. Be hopeful.

There’s a rainbow always after the rain, as another song goes. Look at the positive side. There’s always two sides of the coin.

How can we be hopeful when not so good things happen?

Focus on Jesus. Not to your self nor even to your circumstance. Yes, you may not be in control but He is. Trust Him. He knows what is best for you because you are His beloved.

So I encourage everyone that when you experience rains in your life (the literal and the figurative ones), may we pause, look at it from a different perspective and choose to see its beauty. May we always be grateful whatever circumstance we may have. Because dear one, there’s always hope because God has promised that He is always with us. He will never abandon us. And not just that, He also said that He makes all things work together for our good because He loves us so much.

Like me, You too can overcome!

“I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength,” says Paul in Philippians 4:13. ❤

Pondering on this verse, I know that through Jesus, I can overcome. But for me, it is easier said than done.

You know what? Being alone or specifically, traveling alone is one of my greatest fears that I thought I cannot overcome.

I’m not fond of traveling alone especially to places I’m not familiar with because of the fear of being lost, deceived, or taken advantage of. I also fright of talking to people I don’t know or asking questions and directions due to the thought that the people I’m asking might not give me right answers or just ignore me. My thought is that, being alone makes me very vulnerable to experiencing bad things. Who knows, right? It’s sad to say but I became paranoid. I lived in fear that something unfavorable might always happen whenever I’m alone.

That’s why when I travel, as much as possible, I go with someone who will accompany me. At the back of my mind, at least when lost, I’m not alone. When something bad happens, someone would be there to give courage or even protect me. And with that, my heart can be at peace. That’s what I thought so.

But I know that God doesn’t want me to live in fear. Just like what Ptr. Rick Warren said in his devotional called Daily Hope, How to choose faith over fear, “Fear always limits you. You can’t experience God’s best for you if you’re living in fear.”

God wants me to experience life to the fullest.

That is why He’s been changing my heart, taking away my fear of exploring places alone and giving me a calming reassurance that wherever I go, He is with me. And that is one of His wonderful promises to me that I have been forgetting all this time.

Thankfully, little by little, I was able to overcome. All by His grace, I am able to overcome this fear of being alone. All by the strength He gives, I am able to reject the idea and the lie that I am alone because the truth is, I am not. HE IS WITH ME.

And just two days ago, I was able to prove to myself that I am an overcomer and that I am not alone because I have Jesus with me.

This is how my day went.

It was 22nd of April, 2019. I had to go to different places in Manila to do some tasks all by myself. Of course, knowing that I cannot stay longer in Manila because I left some other tasks that I need to accomplish back at my hometown, I have to make the most out of the time that I’ll be there.

My first stop was at BPI in España. Then, after eating lunch at St. Thomas Sq., I head straight to Divisoria to look for rubber gloves that I can use when I do the laundry. (Of course, I bought other things too.)

When I was done shopping, I then took a jeepney ride to Luneta. I had the privilege to admire God’s wonderful creation while looking at the trees that are now in full bloom.

After having my photoshoot among the beautiful trees and some flowers, I took another jeepney ride to Mabini. It was only my first time to go there on my own and my second time to be there and thankfully, I wasn’t lost. When I arrived at the office I needed to go to, I had to take some courage to talk to some personnel whom I didn’t personally know. Wuhoo! Well, thank God it was a success!

Then, I headed to my next destination–Roxas Boulevard–to watch the beautiful sunset in Manila bay for the first time in forever! But because it’s still too early to see the sunset and it’s too hot outside, I decided to wait in a proudly-Pinoy fast-food restaurant near the bay (Jollibee). After ordering my food, I decided to sit in a table-for-two, ate slowly so that I can taste the food well, rested while listening to the music being played over the radio and waited for the right time to get out to watch the sun set. I was peacefully waiting.

But it was past 5 O’clock when a strong earthquake made the electricity of the restaurant went out and shook the ground for few seconds. Everyone had to evacuate to a safer ground. I do not know but by that time, I wasn’t really scared.

I know that it’s not just because I have experienced a lot of earthquakes before but because of the peace that comes from the Lord.

Something unfavorable happened and I’m all by myself right? Remember my paranoia before? That there has to be someone who’s with me when such thing happens?

I wasn’t alone.

GOD WAS WITH ME. HE IS ALWAYS WITH ME.

Just like how He mentioned in the Bible that He’s with us 365 times, He’s promising that He will be with us every single day. How comforting is that, right?

And here are some of the verses saying that we don’t have to be afraid because He is with us.

Psalms 23:4

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”

Joshua 1:9

“This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

And when the lies come knocking at my door again, I know that God’s Holy Spirit is there to remind me of His promises.

So what happened after the earthquake?

I was still able to fulfill my dream of watching the sunset in Manila Bay. And I was really in awe of how beautiful it is. I tried capturing its beauty by my phone’s camera but somehow, reality exceeds expectation this time! God’s awesome power and greatness is displayed right before my eyes.

Deep inside my heart, I was contemplating, “If God can paint the sky as beautiful as this, how can He not be so mindful of me whom He died for?” (Psalms 8:3-4)

My heart was full. Fear was overcame. I was reminded that He is in control of everything.

And you know what, I didn’t just had a date with God that day. I even had the opportunity to spend time with my best friend and mentor too, Ate Cla.

God made that day really special!

Through all that happened, I knew that through Jesus’ victory over sin and death, I can be where God wants me to go and be who He wants me to become–a strong and dependent woman to Him–without fear of anything because He is with me.

To God be the glory!